Khalid Hussain (khalid_hussain) wrote,
Khalid Hussain

Ponedjeljak, 12 Ramazan, 1436

The Opening Prayer (from Ibn 'Arabi's Awrad al-usbu')

Planet: Moon

Prophet: Adam

Moon phase: Gibbous - overcoming

The Sun will soon enter 7 Cancer: A group of rabbits dressed as if in human clothes walk as if on parade (Sabian symbol for 8 Cancer).

The Moon is in its 19th mansion, which extends from 21 Scorpio 25 to 4 Sagittarius 17. This is the fifth mansion within the third seven-fold cycle of the 28 mansions.

In Ibn 'Arabi's listing, the 19th mansion signifies The Air, whose letter is ز and whose Divine Name is The Living One, .الْحَىُّ

In the traditional Arabic system, the 19th mansion is known as As-Shaula, The Sting. Its keywords are contraception, birthing, precautionary measures, magical safeguard. Its image is that of a woman holding her hands before her face. The angel of this mansion is Amutiel.

There are no significant transits or ingresses today.

This past morning I went to a Sufi study group on the Divine Names. There was a woman there who used to live on the other side of the town where I now live. Afterward we traded information about some of the mosques in Hartford. She and I were the only ones in the study group who were fasting. After discussing the reading material, she invited people to read a juz of the Qur'an. I demurred because I had told my husband approximately when I would be home, and I could tell that it would take a few minutes at least to get people focused, plus the time to read, and I was fading a bit and wanted to get home.

I find that, when I am fasting, I have limited tolerance for being out of the house. The right kind of activities, in small doses, can be good, but essentially I want to be on retreat as much as possible. I noticed during the meeting that I was feeling a bit transparent to my feelings and inner sensations, as if I were slightly high on hallucinogens. Because the majority of the people there were not fasting, I didn't sense that they were in a similar place, and I felt a bit vulnerable to share some of my experiences with the reading this past week. Mostly I listened and tried to gauge the level of the discourse, which was kind of unfocused but not awful. Let's just say that, I have concerns about oversharing on the one hand, and also of being perceived as being perhaps a bit aggressively intellectual on the other hand. So I just try to take things easy and see how they go.

I find that I'm still processing feelings that are coming up in regard to the Supreme Court decision. There is a lot of hurt, a lot of trauma, a lot of humiliation to process, and it's not all over just because the Supreme Court made a decision by a narrow majority. The decision may have opened the gates to a certain amount of healing, but my husband and I have been around long enough to believe that it would be naive to consider this some kind of generalized cultural victory for gay people.



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