Khalid Hussain (khalid_hussain) wrote,
Khalid Hussain

Četvrtak, 21 Ševval, 1436

Planet of the day (according to Ibn 'Arabi): Jupiter

Prophet of the day (according to Ibn 'Arabi): Moses

Lunar phase: Disseminating Moon - Demonstration (Phase names and keywords from Dane Rudhyar, The Lunation Cycle)

The Sun has passed through 12 Leo (in my 11th house): A bearded Odysseus stands at the prow of his ship and sets a course towards the Western Sun. (Symbol for 13 Leo from Martin Goldsmith, The Zodiac by Degrees, 2nd ed.) An old sea captain rocking himself on the porch of his cottage. (Symbol for 13 Leo from Dane Rudhyar, An Astrological Mandala) The Sun is currently in 13 Leo (also in my 11th house): A sweet, dreamy schoolgirl recounts a strange but beautiful experience. A winged cherub, invisible to her audience, hovers near her and whipspers in her ear. (Symbol for 14 Leo from Martin Goldsmith, The Zodiac by Degrees, 2nd ed.) A human soul seeking opportunities for outward manifestation. (Symbol for 14 Leo from Dane Rudhyar, An Astrological Mandala)

This evening, the Moon will enter Taurus (in my 8th house). In the afternoon, it will enter my 9th house.

I went to New York to attend a Brandon Flowers concert last night. (That's why there was no entry for Wednesday.) As part of the journey to and from the concert, I reflected on how I came to know his music. By 2008, my friendship with Y had run its course. That began in 2005, after he had had a falling out (over his involvement in the Amma org) with his best friend of several years. For a time, I seemed to fill that role (or something like it) for him. Looking back, I was able to see how he reached out for friendship, how the wave of the friendship got rolling, how it crested, and how it fell away. While it was falling away, a wave of close friendship with L began to develop. I was able to see part of that process during the time that I was being displaced. After some time, that friendship seems to have met a similar fate. I can see now that this appears to be his pattern. I had certain needs for support and compansionship (particularly since I was in the process of losing my mother), and several people met those needs partially and--perhaps more crucially for me--failed to meet them, in some cases adding significantly to the pain of my situation. These are the kinds of lessons that teach us what not to look for in others, especially when we know that we're feeling particularly vulnerable. It's possible to be grateful to the lessons that we have learned, once the intensity of the pain subsides, but that doesn't mean that others aren't accountable for the pain that they helped to cause us.

In any event, I was driving home from satsang one Saturday night, after Y had moved away, and heard a song on a college radio station. I couldn't tell it if it was new, in a retro style, or an older song that I had never heard before. I didn't find out who the band was. Months later, I was looking at a porn clip online that had a dubbed-over music track. I recognized the song and, this time, with the lyrics fresh in my mind, I traced it to The Killers. When I found their video, I developed an instant pop star crush on the singer, i.e. Brandon Flowers. That was sometime in the spring or summer of 2009. As I got to know more of their music, I found that it revitalized my interest in pop music, which had been waning for a few years. I have now seen Flowers four times in concert: once each for The Killers' 3rd and 4th albums, and once each for his two solo albums. The Killers are powerful and dynamic, but I find the solo work more personal. Here's a clip from last week sometime of the song that he used to close the concert last night:

Only the young can break away, break away
Lost when the wind blows, on your own, oh-oh-oh



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