July 20th, 2011

Hu design


Recent events have led me to wonder how much of my frustration with my most recent attempt to include a social dimension in my spiritual path may have to do with how little support I really found there for focused devotion to Kali.

As with just about anything that draws me, everyone seems to have an opinion about it, but they obviously don't "get" why it's important to me, nor are they open to my sharing my enthusiasm about it beyond a certain point. (This was the case with my childhood enthusiasm for films like 2001 and Dr. Zhivago, then with Russian language, literature, and music, with modernist music in general, with Sufism, etc.)

What I have rediscovered, in the last week or so, is the difference between duty and discipline on one hand, and the sense of being "in love" on the other. When it comes around, I tend to choose the feelings of love, even when they mess things up a little bit.

To quote the band that seems connected with this little resurgence of feeling:

If I'm guilty of anything
It's loving you too much
Honey, sometimes love
Means getting a little rough
This is not bad love

Om Krim Kalyai Namaha,