It kind of makes sense that, during this period, I would discover a desire to restore a sense of structure and discipline to my spiritual life. It also makes sense that I would be as focused on boundaries as I am.
Overall, I feel supported in working and in pursuing intellectual activity (whether or not it is directly related to my professional work). I also find myself desiring solitary spiritual retreat.
To the extent that I find myself remembering what it felt like when opportunities came my way--and when there was spontaneous blending of energies with others--these seem like memories of another time that served purposes other than the purposes I need to have served now. It's a kind of a habit to want experiences, and to want people to share them with, but it seems that those impulses are not supported at present. Over time, it becomes easier to witness those kinds of memories and desires welling up and then to just let them fade away. If such things are meant to come my way again, they will, even if the place where I am now seems perfectly appropriate to my age.
In my 40s, it seems that I was willing to engage in a lot of striving, personally and professionally. Not so much now. I'm willing to work professionally, but I'm not interested in striving to please others (especially those who show a lack of willingness to work in the ways that they should).